What are the things happy people never do, or like at all? When we think of improving our lives, we tend to think of things we need to start doing – we should start exercising more, start meditating every day and start eating more healthily. This article will give you an insight into the things happy people never do. Keep reading.
Things happy people never do, or Like al all
Thinking about happiness may be similarly enlightening, revealing a range of habits that might have a detrimental impact on your life and your well-being. We turned to the experts for advice on how to be happy, concentrating on the 13 things happy people never do.
1. Screen savyness
We all waste much too much time staring at our phones. There are now applications that measure our phone usage so that, ironically, we can spend time on our phones looking at the data that tells us we’re using our phones too much!
Distraction is the fundamental issue with our phone addiction. We can’t focus on our job or our family because we’re always checking our phones to see whether we’ve received any WhatsApp messages in the previous three minutes. It should come as no surprise that this has a negative impact on our happiness.
We don’t allow ourselves to accomplish “deep work” at work because we are always checking our phones and disrupting our attention.
2. Ignore their feelings
Being a cheerful person does not imply that you are always joyful, that you go about with a grin on your face and whistle to yourself. A typically cheerful person understands that having a bad day is OK as long as they admit it and do not try to conceal or avoid it. This is one of the things happy people never do.
“Truly happy individuals feel all of their emotions—anger, sadness, and so on—and then release them in order to go ahead,” Manly adds. “This promotes optimism by preventing negative emotions from becoming trapped in the mind and body, fueling negative emotions like despair, rage, and resentment.”
3. Compare with other people around
Hugo Huyer, a mental health consultant who maintains the Tracking Happiness website, believes that “happy individuals realize that comparison is the thief of joy.”
“There is always someone who appears to have things better than you, no matter what you do or where you are. You’ll always find a reason to be sad if you focus on this. People that are happy are aware of this and concentrate on what they have rather than what others have.”
4. Listening instead of talking
Are you guilty of any of the following when someone else is speaking?
- After a few minutes of talking, you realize your mind has strayed and you haven’t been paying attention to what they’re saying.
- Waiting impatiently for the other person to finish speaking so you may provide your wise counsel?
- In your eagerness to get your words out, are you interrupting the other person?
I’ll be the first to say that I’m guilty of all of the aforementioned offenses, and I’m prepared to guess that I’m not alone.
The majority of us are poor listeners. This might not only lead us into difficulty, but it can also destroy our relationships. When we don’t pay attention to someone, we’re sending them the impression that we don’t care about what they’re saying, or, worse, about them.
5. Too many Screen attachments
People have been proven to feel extremely happy when they are in a condition known as “flow” – that is, when they are using their abilities and are completely engrossed in what they are doing. We deprive ourselves of the joy of experiencing the flow state by continually disrupting our attention to look through social media posts.
Stop using your phone so much! The solution to this source of misery is easy but difficult: stop using your phone so much! Turn off notifications and create specified periods of the day when you are permitted to check your phone to make this a bit simpler.
I emphasized before how important it is to listen to others in order to build deep connections. When you’re in the middle of a discussion, how many times have you checked your phone?
Turning your focus away from the person you’re conversing with sends a clear message to them that whatever is going on on your phone is more important. That message has the potential to be quite harmful to a relationship.
6. Others are bullied
Successful individuals aren’t always happy, and making others miserable or bullying subordinates, coworkers, or anybody else in their life is a piece of solid evidence that they don’t have real joy in their lives.
“Truly joyful individuals never bully others,” says Carla Marie Manly, clinical psychologist and author of Joy From Fear. “A really happy person is uninterested in accumulating power and riches at the cost of others. As a result, a really happy person is devoid of the harmful emotions that a persistent critic or bully harbors.”
7. Being reactive, not proactive
Living in this manner implies that there will always be an underlying sense of discomfort that we are not living up to our full potential or in accordance with our passions and ideals.
Try outlining your perfect life – where you’d want to live, what kind of job you’d like to have, and how you’d like to spend your leisure time. Then make a comparison between your ideal life and your actual reality.
Consider how you may begin to bring the ideal into the real world. If you wish to relocate, retrain, or take up a new interest, ask yourself why you haven’t done so before. Is it because you can’t or because you haven’t tried?
8. Forget about living in the now
Rather than dwelling over the past or fixating on their aspirations and concerns for the future, happy individuals live in the current moment, finding things to appreciate in the here and now.
“Happy people learn from their mistakes, but they don’t dwell on them all the time,” Gupta adds. “They also recognize that worrying about what could happen in the future is akin to living in a fiction. As a result, people tend to be less concerned about it and instead concentrate on enjoying the present moment.”
9. Not accepting, but fighting
Learn how to put an end to the battle. I’m not suggesting it’ll be easy since most of us have spent our lives battling. However, learning that you are not a prisoner to your emotions and that you can always choose how to react to any situation is freeing.
Try practicing acceptance the next time anything awful happens. Tell yourself that there’s nothing you can do about what’s happened, and that reacting with bad feelings would only injure you. Simply taking a breather between the incident and your reaction will help you relax your emotions and respond more calmly.
10. Keep track of their friend’s and partner’s progress
Another habit that happy individuals avoid is keeping track of their relationships. That means they don’t keep track of the things they’ve done for others, such as going further to meet up with pals or performing more housework than their partner.
“There are no 50-50 divisions of responsibility” in a strong relationship, whether sexual or platonic, according to Walfish. “In the best relationships, it would be difficult to determine who serves one another more,” happy people acknowledge.
11. Nurture a grudge in conscience
People that are happy can be irritated or frustrated with others, but they don’t allow it to consume their time and attention. If they are wronged, they take steps to guarantee that it does not happen again.
They do not, however, focus on the fact that they have been wronged, nor do they allow it to become a cause of continual aggravation for them. They don’t carry grudges, in other words.
“Holding on to unpleasant thoughts about someone isn’t good for your health,” Rittmeyer adds. “By refusing to let go of these unpleasant sentiments, you’re putting more stress on your body by repeatedly thinking about and reliving the events that caused the problem in the first place.”
12. Others are to blame
Content individuals believe that they are in charge of the majority of their lives. If they don’t like a result, they try to modify it rather than throwing their hands up and giving up, and blaming someone else.
According to Kapil Gupta, a relationship and men’s interpersonal counselor, “happy people accept full responsibility for their life events.” “They understand that blaming other people or circumstances will not change their current situation, even if it may provide temporary relief.”
13. Attempt to influence the future
It’s one thing to make plans for the future and take action to secure the best potential outcome. It’s one thing to be continuously thinking about potential downsides in the future and obsessing about how you’ll deal with them.
“[Unhappy individuals] are really concerned about how their lives will end out,” says Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, author, and psychotherapist. “They don’t attempt to manage their lives or sit about waiting for things to happen to them. This lack of need to control outcomes, in addition to not fearing failure or mistakes, permits them to take reasonable risks.”
Consider the poor behaviors you need to change before focusing on developing new good habits. Stopping can be far more effective than in the beginning.
- Avoid talking and start listening instead of reacting.
- Avoid being reactive and start being proactive.
- Avoid allowing your perspective to deteriorate.
- Avoid arguing rather than accepting! STOP staring at your phone!
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